excerpts

Yey! The weekend's upon us again! Isn't it amazing how days whiz by so fast - there and not there - in a heartbeat. Each day, nuance and sidelight could evoke all kinds of emotions. Adverse thoughts, too. A lot of laughter, a bit of pain, a load of frustration, a pinch of jealousy perhaps, or a combination of everything you go through. Workday or lazy day, it won't even matter. As long as there is learning and the chance to contribute to human greatness, there won't be any room for doubt, pressure or frustration. Carpe diem! Sieze the day! (Or in this case, seize the weekend!)

My work week is not yet over though. Still have a day's work waiting for me tomorrow, Saturday. A few more notches to tie, some loose ends to fix and time to prep up for next week's tasks. Better be on the lookout for whatever (SURPRISE!!!) lies ahead. Well, this only applies to me, given the sort of work environment I'm in: a pit of cramped, muddled, bottomless, endless smorgasboard. Pretty exciting, don't you think?

One of my tasks include handling tons of paperwork. Everything M.A.J.O.R., literally, begins from my work station. If there's a perk I enjoy at work, that would be meeting and talking to all types of people. I love it! As much as I enjoy talking, I'm also a good listener. Anecdotes keep me alive. Comic timing is a rare treat. Especially if it's heard from another person's point-of-view...

IS THIS SEAT TAKEN? Have you ever wondered why some banks don't have those numbered paper thingies anymore? That was my personal question 3 days before Christmas last year while I lined up at this bank. The same question was finally answered when I went to the same bank for work-related reasons this afternoon. Mr. Bank Manager regalled me with his 3-pronged analysis to his bank's decision to remove those numbered paper thingies. It was such a laugh trip! Mr. Bank Manager, seemingly poker-faced, with twinkling eyes and a colorful language repertoire, really leaves me in stitches! 1st: Supposedly, it was never their intention to make their clients sit on 50 seats until they reach the designated teller for each transaction. Instead, the process of lining up should have been this way: Imagine 50 seats (10 per row). As soon as the 1st 10 seats/clients have been served by the tellers, the next row of clients occupying the succeeding 10 seats should move up to the 1st row, so on and so forth. Thus, it won't be "sit down, sit down" on 50 seats but only "sit down, sit down" on 5 seats per client! But, this setup never materialized because of clients innate mitrust between themselves. 2nd: This is a good way to catch unscrupulous people posing as bank clients. He said, what's the point of waiting in line (read: 50 seats) just for the heck of it and not having any legit transaction at all? A shady character could be lurking behind hooded eyes, someone may be planning a holdup (hopefully not!) or another only wants to make the most out of the bank's airconditioned premises. Can you believe that some would even go to lengths and sell the number thingies they have to those who want to get ahead of the line! 3rd: The practice of "advance party" at the bank was minimized. In his words: "Nagkakarigos pa ngani ngaya su totoong kliyente, pero may pinakua na syang enot nin numero dawa bako man sya ito! Unfair man na maabot sya digdi na nakapag-lipstick na asin bagong karigos habang an iba nag-iskusar na maglinya and maghalat na apudon an saindang numero..." (read: the bank client leisurely takes a bath while another person takes a number for him. It's unfair that he/she goes to the bank looking good & freshened up while there are other bank clients who patiently wait for their turn..."). Very light-hearted explanation, right?

MINI CHANGES MAKE HIM A LITTLE BIT MORE...MINE? Hopefully, again and soon! Or it could be just wishful thinking. Call me hopeless. My oh my! I like it when a man takes charge of his life, his work, his passions and his daily challenges. Keeping busy because he's tired of just standing around in between projects, minimizing his usual dose of nightly sessions with beer buds and being more responsible. He has style & flair that never screams "Hey, look at me! I'm THE man!" (that's purely pathetic!). Instead, he holds that silent strength of character which can be compared to the delightfulness of an ecstatic moan. He is sexy, strong, smart, sweet and has a great smile. His eyes are like "liquid honey or dark molasses-mesmerizing-piercing without any bad intent". Irresistible, yes. But, a tad out-of-reach for me, for now. How it's come to this? It's entirely his decision and I respect that. Altho most of the time i just want to ask him for a hug! Haha. I'm just being a girl, seemingly content with making goo-goo eyes, drooling, daydreaming, loving every glance & keeping a safe distance. Until when? Hmmm.

Happy weekend, y'all!

2009

Two words came to mind: infinity pool. The same words that may best describe the first few days of my new year. Underneath the calm surface lies a shadow of real turbulence marked by pros and cons, decisions and uncertainties, love and disappointment, learning and lies, honor and anarchy, humanity and mistrust.

I'm starting to wobble - something that shouldn't reach full-blown capacity or else (you paint the picture). There is the fear of drowning in my personal pit of self-doubt. Sometimes, the thrill of tackling and handling new challenges is no longer that empowering. I even wonder if love will ever be the same again. But taking baby steps everyday also seem to lead to grace under pressure. Trodding. Plodding. Numbness. Awareness. Reality. Truth.

The realization that love will never be enough to spare anyone from being hurt holds a real ring to it. It's even beyond understanding why even those you hold dear are the same people who will trample on you even without provocation. The universality of familial caring is just another way to blindside anyone with the best of intentions. Respect seems to be so rare, even among those who share the same bloodline. Passion suddenly disappears in the blink of an eye, without any rational reason or explanation. And just like that, you suddenly find yourself in a desolute state of being alone again: to ponder, dwindle, gasp and hang on to what's left of you.

Amidst everything and everyone, there is always enough hope to get you through the remaining 355 days of this year. Regardless of how bad the economy may be, how the northwest monsoon coldly blows, how loud you may hear you heart breaking, how your facial wrinkles seem to pile up on top of each other and how many times you fall flat on your nose, there is always a reason to say: Cheers!